Monday, July 25, 2005

This vague darkness...

I was going to make a post about all the movie remakes. I was going to vent about how frustrated I was with the lack of creativity in hollywood writing and the degeneration of the art form. But I read what I was writing and was completely disinterested.

What moves me? I liked Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and I liked War of the worlds. I actually liked all the movie remakes (that I saw). Who has time to whine about movies? I don't.

I have to move. My roommate of one year is selling the house. I am homeless again. But I'll say this for the record: I will not--not for one minute--miss those filthy animals that contaminated that house.

The deck seems stacked against me. The losing hand keeps being dealt. Maybe I should stop thinking about life as chance. I should find the purpose of losing all the time. As if. Maybe I should smile more and be more cheerful so others around me feel better. Maybe I should give a rip.

You know those people who are so nice? They seem so sweet and innocent and cheerful. The darker side of me wants to slap them. Shake them up and show them some reality. At what cost? The illusion of innocence. Reality sucks. Innocence is the lie that keeps people from facing reality. We try to keep people innocent as long as possible so that they stay positive. Positivity is inspiring and hopeful. And people who are neck-deep in reality need innocent hope once in a while. So we keep the innocent around. They have their use.

The thing is, once innocence is lost it is never recovered. The danger is letting the darkness of reality darken you. If you can maintain your light with the full understanding of how dark things really are, then you've got something. But you'll never know how dark things are until you've been darkened a little yourself.

6 comments:

shannoncaroland said...

I read this a while back, and didn't know what to say. So I said nothing. then, checking back I saw that the only comment it received was spam. So, to try to spare you some dignity I thought I'd better add something. So, consider this vague encouragement for your vague darkness... I guess.

Anonymous said...

"Innocence is the lie that keeps people from facing reality."
Maybe, innocence is the reality God would like us to have that some choose to spoil. God bless the innocent... literally.

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